Pictures with Charmie Modi Photo

First looks are a pivotal moment in any wedding day. The big question is when should you do your first look? Should it happen at the aisle, or privately before the ceremony? Each option comes with its pros and cons!

Picture by BE Studios

The Benefits of Seeing Each Other Early

Doing a first look before the ceremony can save valuable time between the ceremony and reception. Right after your first look, you can knock out wedding party photos and most family portraits ahead of time. This way, your wedding party and family members can enjoy cocktail hour, and you and your partner can have a longer private moment together. Overall, it helps reduce the rush and creates a smoother timeline.

Another big pro is privacy. With no guests watching, you may feel more comfortable and relaxed. It’s just the two of you and your photographer capturing the moment. This also gives you more control if you want to ensure a certain reaction when you walk down the aisle. You can be as emotional and vulnerable as you want without an audience.

A first look also gives you a rare private moment before the whirlwind of the day officially begins. Weddings are busy, and everyone will want to celebrate with you. This intimate time allows you to connect, breathe, and soak it all in before being surrounded by love and excitement from your guests.

If you’re worried a first look will take away from that emotional moment at the altar, don’t be! Chances are, you’ll still feel all the emotions when you walk down the aisle. It’s such a significant moment in your life that the feelings will still hit you, but you might feel a little calmer knowing the pressure of that first reaction is already behind you.

From a photography perspective, first looks are especially beneficial for guaranteeing daylight, which is crucial for winter weddings. You also have the freedom to get creative! You can choose a meaningful or scenic location for your first look, giving you a beautiful variety of shots beyond the ceremony itself.

Photo by The Hornes Photo

Reasons to Skip the First Look

The biggest con of doing a first look before the ceremony is that it breaks tradition. If tradition is more important, waiting until the altar might be the better choice. You’ll still get beautiful reaction photos. However, you might feel more nervous leading up to that moment.

Another consideration is the timeline. Without a first look, your day will likely need to start earlier to ensure enough time for getting ready, the ceremony, and all your portraits before the reception begins. If anything unexpected happens (like hair and makeup running late), it could cut into your photo time. This can also mean you’ll miss out on cocktail hour, and your private moment together may be shorter.

Additionally, you may feel more nervous walking down the aisle. First looks at the altar aren’t private. All eyes will be on you, even if you’re only focused on each other. Some couples feel added pressure to react a certain way because they know everyone is watching. If you’re uncomfortable with public displays of emotions, this can make the moment feel a bit staged, inauthentic, or even awkward.

Photo by Andres Lopez Films

A Creative Alternative to the First Look

A great compromise is a “first touch”. This allows you to calm your nerves and share a special moment while preserving the tradition of waiting until the altar to see each other. During your first touch, you could share a prayer, take a celebratory shot, or simply hold hands and sock it all in. This all depends on the vibe you’re going for. Some couples also choose to exchange love letters, whether they read them quietly to themselves or out loud to each other. It’s a beautiful way to connect before the ceremony without giving away that first look.

Photo by Hey Devan Photo

Your Wedding, Your Moment, Your Decision

In Hindu weddings, the mandap serves as the sacred space where the couple traditionally see each other for the first time during the ceremony. This moment holds deep cultural and emotional significance, symbolizing the start of the marital journey. As a Hindu bride myself, this is what I imagined for my wedding day. However, as a planner, I know opting for a first look before the ceremony offers practical benefits, such as easing nerves and allowing for intimate photographs without guests. However, it also means deviating from the traditional sequence of events, which might be a consideration for those who value customary practices.

Ultimately choosing between maintaining tradition and embracing a first look comes down to personal preference. Factors like your timeline, the availability of natural light, and your feelings about capturing private moments should all play a role in your decision. A skilled wedding planner can assist in navigating these choices, ensuring that your wedding day reflects your unique vision and values.